Being a subject of my family expectation is a big responsibility for my whole life. When I decided to continue and prove my ambition, all the things that used to be usual in my life have changed now. I have different point of views about my days to come. They are no longer the same as I was still a small boy. But today, I am a grown up man now and see everything seriously as what an adult man should see it. Well, it is me today, Adrian-the real man.
Why am I here??
It is a big question that always comes to my heart in every minute of every breath of my life. It takes me to the point of realization that why I am here for or what my aim in life actually is. I come here aside from proving my sincere ambition; I also want to learn something that I don’t know yet. But above all, deep down in my heart, I want to know about myself more until I truly know who I am. I wish that one day I could be my own self, neither you nor they could duplicate my self. I want just to be me. And being myself, as I am completely convinced, is the real blessing for others.
Why did He create me??
I never know about the big reason behind as to why God created me in the first place? But I just feel that being alive in this world has taught me much lessons of life and those are just enough for me to understand this big question. I only say thanks to God for all the blessings imparted on my life through. I really want to know about the mystery that was born with me in order my life would be full of graces but to understand You in my capacity is truly unreachable dream of mine. Your love is just enough for me to know you.
Why must I suffer??
With thousands of God’s love has already been a proof in my life that suffering is love itself. Being loved makes me survive in endless suffering. Could suffering bring me to a brighter life? Or it just escorts me into a deeper suffering? I don’t know for sure and in heart of mine suffering is love.
What would my future be?
Hoping that at the end of this suffering of mine, there will be no disappointing love for me but bring me to a peaceful paradise where there is no pain. As many people are striving, I need to be able to master the learning to know, to do, to be and to how. That is all what I want to be and hope that God would have the same dream for me. Thanks God and here I am, ADRIANUS SURYANTO, whom you have baptized in the name of the father, and of the son and of the Holy Spirit and my parents said “AMEN” for me but I was crying as a sign of my agreement.